Photo By: Dagny Mol
I’d like to write a book someday, but… I’m not just that great of a writer.
I’d like to try something new, but… I’m afraid I would just embarrass myself.
Sound familiar?
I know I’ve been guilty of this way of thinking.
Often we make excuses for not trying something new because we don’t want to fail at it. This is especially true for us perfectionists.
In fact, the more things you’re really good at, the more likely this type of thinking will pop up and try to hold you back.
The reason for this is that you set such a high standard with the work you do, that others expect you to be as good at everything else you do. At least that’s what the crazy little voice inside my head tells me from time to time.
This thought is not without a certain measure of reason. I remember a student who I went to high school with. He told me that he could easily get all “A’s”, but if he managed all “A’s”, and then ended up with a “B” his parents would be upset. So he just tried a little less, got mostly “B’s” and then his parents celebrated whenever he occasionally “managed to get an A.”
That whole situation sounds like a story from a parody of a Marcus Buckingham book – “StrengthsHider 2.0,” “Now, Apply Some of Your Strengths,” or “Go, Put Your Strengths On A Lunchbreak.”
But the truth is: no one is an expert at anything first time.
No one picks up a guitar and records top-selling song on the first try.
Nobody jumps into a swimming pool and wins the Olympic gold metal on their first day learning to swim.
Even Michael Jordan and Larry Bird were terrible the first time they picked up a basketball (Yes, I just dated myself there).
In fact, I thought about this when I saw my son pick up a basketball the other day.
Yes, he missed his first shot, but that didn’t stop him from trying again. He had a lot of fun shooting a basketball – over and over and over again – even though it wasn’t even going in the basket to start with.
What a celebration we had the first time it did go in!
What can you and I learn from this?
Don’t let fear of failure stop you from trying something new – even the best professionals were all terrible before they were great.
The odd part is, NOW is the time to try and fail. Now is the time to really try something and fall flat on your face.
Why? Because now you’re in the shadows; now you’re not in the spotlight with everyone watching you.
I’ve struggled with, well, still struggle with, the idea of fear preventing me from doing something. The best advice I’ve gotten is to try now before a small mistake costs me something more later.
The odds are? Few people are actually watching, and those who are, they’ll love you either way.
Great perspective Ellory – making a new mistake means that you area trying something – and learning.
In the trying we find what we are good and not good at. It’s about starting and persevering even when we fail. The Strengths Finder books are great!
Fear of failure has held me back from pursing public speaking. I’m still in the middle and working through that fear. Great post!
Thanks for sharing Dan – I think it was Wayne Gretzky who said “You miss 100% of the shots you never take” – the act of trying has great value, as does sticking with it!
Great quote!
And on the opposite side of that, I usually doubt my writing. I catch my passive sentences, awkward phrasing, and excessive use of adjectives 🙂
Even I read over my last sentence, I corrected it because I wrote passively.
It’s a daily struggle working with your weakness. That’s why I spend more time interviewing leaders and asking for Guest Posts. I can’t handle writing content. Outsource your weaknesses
That’s a call to action. Just do it and keep going. Simple … yet powerful. Thanks, Jon for writing.
Thanks Arlen – so what are you going to make happen?
Thanks for your reply, Jon, and thanks for your question. I deliberated so long about blogging. Always in the future. Sometime. Somewhere. What is the subject? And other questions. ‘Twas baloney. I can’t wait until I have an audience. Duh. I start right now. I need to start where I am at now. I have my inspiration. My vision. My passion. I just did it. Warts and all. Here we go. Practice in public. Learning by doing. Cha-ching! Having a blast. We’re cruising at: http://storiesmadepowerful.com/
I’m glad you started, I like what I see on your site!